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Мпб 00. Who Is U.Y. Tashkov (Presentation in 3 languages, Contents)

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  • Аннотация:
      This is an introductory booklet in English, Russian, and Bulgarian, explaining who is this guy U.Y. Tashkov, what this name means in Bulgarian, what kind of verses he writes and why writes them, when they are dirty and cynical. There is also contents of all booklets he will publish, yet all is in Bulgarian.
      Keywords: poetry, dirty, cynical, sexy, funny, light verse,
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====>*_MALKA PICHOVSKA BIBLIOTEKA 00_*
===>*_MPB 00. WHO IS U.Y. TASHKOV (Presentation in 3 languages, Contents)_*
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==>*_Copyright /_U.J. Tashkov_/, 1998 - 2019_*
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==>*_CONTENTS_*
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-->1. About the author (in English)
-->2. Ob avtore (na russkom)
-->3. Za avtora (na bylgarski)
-->4 . Sydyrzhanie na serijata
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==>*_ABOUT THE AUTHOR (in English)_*
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-->Hi, people, no matter of what sex you are,
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-->Although it matters, naturally. And I would say that this is the thing that matters most of all on this material world, and hope you'll agree with me on that topic. But, you see, this is a matter of politeness, and if I would have said "hi" only to the guys, then the girls (as well also the girls between the guys, if you see what I mean) might have felt offended at me. So that, although I am sure that the important sex is the masculine one, the other is just supplemental, I don't deny the right of the women to /_try_/ (yes, why not, they can only try, right?) to feel equal with us, men. Yet this isn't important here, the important discrimination, that I will impose upon my readers, is that I am writing mainly in /_Bulgarian_/. And not only this, but I am writing also not quite decent kind of verses, or rather, /_quite indecent_/ kind of verses, which are usually called cynical, vulgar, forbidden, illegal, and so on, because they treat chiefly the sexual relations. Still, these relations exist, and such verses exist, and I am bold enough to present myself to my, mainly Bulgarian, as just said, readers.
-->OK, my name is Urungel Yovanov Tashkov, or with initials U.Y. Tashkov, where has to be added that "uy" (and read as 'uj', or 'ui' but in one syllable, in almost pure Latin, or then in German) is a bit simplified pronunciation ('huj' to be exact) of masculine penis in Bulgarian, and "tashak" is one of these things that go together with the just mentioned part. I hope you all got my explanations, so that you may call me Mr. /_Testiclov_/, although I would prefer you will rather /_not_/ do this. Then Yovanov (i.e. 'Jovanov'), or with -ich, is Serbian pronunciation of our Ivanov, which name is old and biblical (and in English becomes John). As to the Urungel I am a bit ashamed of it, but, on the other hand, one must not be angry at his father-maker, and he is also long time dead and buried, so that I don't grumble anymore about this name. Ah, well, you have not got it if you are not Bulgarian, so that I have to add that "urungel" is a jargon word for some ugly monster, what is not at all true, you bet it, but, nevertheless, I will avoid to publish my real photo, because, you know, there are some too imaginative people and they may begin to have such ungrounded feelings.
-->Yeah, but, on some other hand, I am really monstrous what concerns my masculine attributes, so that my father was probably right in some sense -- that I am a kind of proverbial beast, like this guy Pan in old Greek mythology, who has become the cause for the emerging of the word panic (as you maybe know). At this moment I am already in my /_soixante-neuf_/ years, and can't boast with big achievements in the amorous business (usually not more than 4-5 times in a row), but in my young years I never went to sleep without 3 or so girls to change them (as spare linens, you know), because after dozen times they began to gasp, when I just entered into my usual rhythm.
-->So where was I? Ah, I have come to my poetical activity, but here everything will go fast, because I have not much verses, and have practically stopped to write more in the last nearly 20 years (where a friend of my at nearly the same age has several thousands of lines and in several languages). My biggest attainment is my MPB, i.e. "/_Malka Pichovska Biblioteka_/" (Small Playboy's Library, so to say, though "pich" in Bulgarian is a richer on nuances notion), where I have introduced 5-level scale for signifying of the fun, marked with stars and beginning from the lowest level of one. Having in mind that in Bulgarian the word "tashak", i.e. my family name, means also fun, yet not something decent, rather like to show in public one's naked bottom, I established that: one star is slight whiff of something sexy (so light that here such verses are as if absent), then two stars is slight tashak (or just a fun, not really indecent, yet not for wide audience), then three stars is middle tashak (a thing that one will not be ashamed to say in a pub, and in mixed company), then four stars is rough tashak (things not for telling before girls, only between man and man, strong curses), and finally five stars mean plump tashak (a bull testicle, so to say, things that even men will abstain to say to their friends, if they are not what is named bosom ones).
-->As format these booklets contain 20 very small pages, of 1/4 of an A4 page, i.e. one title sheet of 2 such double pages (where is the title page, on its back is the contents, then on the end sheet on the inner side of it is one small Appendix, and on the back is the back-side cover), and as pure text only 16 such mini-pages; here everything will be given as continuing text and even the very pages will not be seen clearly. Initially, in the "young years" of our democracy, I hoped to win something with this poetry, because also such /_urungel_/-monsters like me have the right to win something to sustain themselves, but with the years I become more and more convinced that the masses don't like really cynical things, like my poetry, they prefer only vulgar and piggy porno things (where the cynicism is philosophy of life). When so I just publish them now here and there without more hopes (yet I may still want somewhere some money for them). I do this because, when my body, with all its sexual attributes, will turn to dust or atoms, I want to have something left behind, with which to be remembered; most of the guys will have nothing of the kind, but I will have something immortal with what to boast in the other world, because one never knows. I mean that on that immaterial "world" I might be able to do "it" even more times, say, 99, or 101, something of the kind, and I will be able to make contacts with the feminine souls using my verses.
-->Well, as if this is enough as introduction to poetry in a language that you most probably do not know. Ha, ha. But I publish on foreign sites and this requires some presentation of the author, so that I felt myself bound to provide it.
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-->U.Y. Tashkov, March 2019, Sofia, Bulgaria
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==>*_OB AVTORE (na russkom)_*
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-->Oj, gospoda (vkljuchaja i gospozh i madmuazelej),
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-->Trudnovato mne p`isatj po russki (vedj tak?), tem bolee chto mojo tvorchestvo zdesj budet po /_bolgarski_/, no tak i byitj, dlja Vas poproshu kogo-to perevesti neskoljko vstupiteljnyih slov na russkij jazyik. A to vdrug nauchusj so vremenem /_kumekatj_/ i po russki, kto znaet? Bolgarskij, on, mozhno skazatj, staro-russkij (hotja byi vo vremenah Kirila i Mefodija i ego brata byilo tak), tak chto, po idee, on dolzhen byitj ponjaten russkim, no zdesj nemalo zhargonnyih slov, da i v principe ja pisal ranjshe toljko dlja bolgar.
-->Znachitj tak. Menja zovut Urungel Jovanov (mozhet byitj -ich, dlja russkih) Tashkov, chto s inicialami budet: U.J. Tashkov. Mozhno pojasnitj dlja russkih (dedov i bab), chto pervyie dve bukvyi dlja bolgar oznachajut to zhe samoe, chto i s lidirujushchej bukvoj "h" v russkom, a Tashkov v perevode na russkij budet chto-to vrode "Moshonkov", tak kak "tashak" idjot s nemeckogo Tasche chto znachit sumka; mozhete perevoditj i kak "JAichkin", no vsjo aeto ne to, bolgarskie slovo oznachaet i grubaja shutka (kak, skazhem, pokazatj goluju popu). V to zhe vremja Urungel aeto kakoj-to vyirodok, chto ochenj nehorosho so storonyi moego otca, da Bog s nim, sdelal zhe menja chelovek, a i ja uzhe perezhil aeto. Toljko chto ne prosite pomeshchatj zdesj svoju fotografiju, a to vdrug uveruete, chto moj roditelj dal mne praviljnoe imja.
-->Muzhchina ja, kak mozhete dogadatjsja, v rascvete sil (ili po krajnej mere byil kogda pisal svoi pervyie budorazhushchie stihi), gde silyi muzhika v tom chto on "/_mozhet_/" (delatj chto-to s devkami) -- koli ne znaete otkuda aeto slovo i s chem ono svjazyivaetsja. Nu, i moj zhanr v osnovnom pohabnyie stishki, ili nizovyie zhanryi, kak pishut gde-to, hotja oni nizovyie v smyisle chto proishodjat, porozhdenyi, silami zarozhdajushchimisja vnizu u ljudej (da i u zhivotnyih, mezhdu nami govorja), no s drugoj storonyi zhanryi /_vozvyishennyie_/, tak kak tam (vnizu) chto-to podnimaetsja vverh, vedj tak? A i k tomu zhe ljudi interesujutsja takimi veshchami, a ne budut zhe oni interesovatjsja plohimi veshchami, pravda?
-->Vot. I naskoljko vozvyishennyie (ili cinichnyie, ili necenzurnyie) aeti zhanryi pomecheno zvjozdochkami dlja kazhdoj knizhechki moej aepohaljnoj serii MPB (/_Malka Pichovska Biblioteka_/ -- Neboljshaja Biblioteka JO##ra, tak i byitj, perevedu na russki, no "pich" aeto ponjatie napolnennoe bolee raznoobraznyim smyislom chem obyichnyij jo##r, ja Vam skazhu), gde odna zvezda aeto ljogkoe seksi (takih zdesj vrode i netu, slishkom vjalo), dve -- ljogkij "tashak" (a uzhe Vyi perevodite sebe aeto slovo kak jaichko, koli hotite, no toljko ne kurinoe, skoree vsego ljogkaja /_shutka_/), tri -- srednij "tashak", chetyire -- grubyij takoj zhe, i pjatj -- "/_jako myd`o_/" (to bishj boljshoe, chto ni na estj, nastojashchee, mudo). AEti knizhechki v pechatnom vide vyigljadjat kak 20 chetvertj stranichek A4, i oformlenyi v takom porjadke kazhdaja, no zdesj ja prosto privozhu tekst v aetoj ocheredi bez vsjakih ukrashenij. Navernoe budu pomechatj takimi zvjozdochkami i drugie moi proizvedenija, esli opublikuju zdesj.
-->A, chastenjko ja ispoljzuju i naklonjonnyie bukvyi ili /_kur-siv_/ (chto v perevode na russki znachit "seryij i ... moi inicialyi", tochnee v obratnom porjadke, i sinonim inicialov, no vsjo aeto detali), dlja akcentirovanija na nekotoryie mesta, odnako pochemu latincyi reshili davno, chto aeto znachit naklonnyij shrift uma ne prilozhu (nu, ladno, prilozhu na vremja: aeto prosto ot "kursa", a on ot togo chto ... trutsja nogi, kogda chelovek begaet, kursiruet tuda-sjuda).
-->Pervonachaljno, v "molodyie godyi" demokratii, ja dumal podzarabotatj nemnogo na nih, ibo i Urungelyi, kak Vyi ponimaete, dolzhnyi estj, no okazalosj, chto narodu, massam, ne nravjatsja cinichnyie ili filosofskie proizvedenija, im podavaj grubyie vuljgarizmyi, pornografiju (t.e. "porosjashchinu" po drevne-grecheski i po latyini) a aeto ne sovsem mojo amplua; no kak proshli godyi, i kak Internet ustanovilsja tvjordo v nashej zhizni, ja reshil chto mogu ih prosto povesitj gde-to i pustj ljudi kajfujut, vedj na to i demokratija, pravda? V smyisle, chto raz ne mogu zarabotatj, to pustj ljudi priobshchajutsja k moemu tvorchestvu, ibo rabota geniev -- takih kak menja, razumeetsja, -- dolzhna prinadlezhatj vsem ljudjam, a ne udovletvorjatj toljko edinicyi vozvyishennyih duhov kak moj.
-->Nu, dlja vstuplenija vrode hvatit. CHitajte koli mozhete. A to vdrug nauchu i russkij i nachnu razvlekatj Vas na Vashem zhe rodnom (ili ne sovsem) jazyike. A, koe-gde popadaetsja koe-chto i po anglijski. Voobshche-to mir tesen, toljko ... Vash U.J. boljshoj. Baj-baj, gospoda (na poka).
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-->U.J. Tashkov, 2015, Bolgarija
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==>*_ZA AVTORA (na bylgarski)_*
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-->Zdravejte pichove,
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-->Pred svoi hora njama kakvo da se prisvivam i da mynkam, nito za imeto mi, nito za onaja mi rabota, nali? Zashtoto tja e edna takava dylga, che njama kakvo da Vi objasnjavam, dve pedi i tri prysta i nokytja na kutreto v dobavka. Ili pone tolkova beshe kogato ja merih predi desetina godini, zashtoto veche rycete mi malko treperjat, i spokojno mozhe da sbyrkam s edin dva prysta. Ta shte karam nabyrzo.
-->Imeto mi e Urungel Jovanov (abe otpyrvom beshe Jovanovich, zashtoto bashta mi e ot srybski proizhod, ama otkakto s tezi hora neshto ne se razbirame se pisha bez -icha) i po familija Tashkov, koeto, vari go ili go pechi, no napisano s iniciali dava U.J. Tashkov, i kak horata razbirat tova njama nuzhda da vi objasnjavam, vie ste inteligentni hora, predpolagam (a pyk, ako ne ste, togava proverete v Interneta, tam vsichko mozhe da se nameri). Majka mi beshe edna hubava ciganka, njama nachin da ne ti stane kato ja vidish, no kato me rodi men i kato vidja kakva grozotija sym i se zareche poveche da razhda. Koeto mozhe bi e bilo za dobro, zashtoto na men oshte ot zabavachnicata mi styrcheshe postojanno, i ako imah sestri sigurno shtjah da sym gi opravil otrano (to decata, nali znaete, ne znajat koe e pozvoleno i koe ne e), a pyk ako imah bratja to te shtjaha vechno da tynat v zemjata ot sram kato si gi sravnjat s mojata tojaga. Ne che sym chak tolkova grozen, de, az si se haresvam, v krajna smetka, pyk i za myzha znaete koe e po-vazhnoto, no vse pak se vyzdyrzham da slagam originalna snimka po sajtovete, a izpolzuvam edna na moja, tyj da se kazhe kolega, Pan, ili pyk na njakoj obiknoven satir.
-->Tyj, i mojat poetichen zhanr, poradi koeto az i vzeh da se publikuvam po razni mesta, e na lekata i smeshna poezija, ama s /_njuansa_/ -- ako na tova mozhe da mu se kazhe njuans -- na neshto neprilichno, /_cinichno_/, nahalno, dori i vulgarno, no ne i chak porno, de, az sym inteligenten chovek, ne sym ot prostacite; iskam da kazha, che chukaneto si e chukane, no tova ne prechi na intelekta, a mozhe bi i mu pomaga. Ama pyk ne sym samo az deto haresvam takiva neshta, i drugite pichove gi haresvat, nali be averi? Toest njakoi mozhe da narichat takava poezija nizsha, ama spored men tja si e bash /_vyzvishena_/, zashtoto vyzpjava razni styrchashti neshta. Ta kakto i da e, az imam edna osnovna tvorba, mojata epohalna serii MPB, /_Malka Pichovska Biblioteka_/, kydeto az, stimuliran ot familijata si, vyvedoh edna sempla klasifikacija na cinichni i grubi stihove s pet niva, oznachavani sys zvezdichki, kato edin vid edrina na topkite, nali me razbirate. Edna zvezda e samo "leko seksi" (i takiva neshta pri mene maj njama, te sa tvyrde bludkavi), dve zvezdi e "lek tashak", tri e "sreden tashak", chetiri -- "grub tashak", i pet -- "jako myd`o".
-->Kato oformlenie te sydyrzhat 20 mini-stranichki, ot po 1/4 format A4, kato 4 takiva (ili polovin standarten list) sa koricata, kydeto e zaglavieto, sydyrzhanieto, posledna stranichka s prilozhenie, i gyrba, taka che sobstveno teksta na vsjaka edna ot tjah sa 16 takiva chetvyrtinki ili edno nishto i nikakvi 4 lista (po-skoro stranici). E tuk az ne gi davam kato takiva stranichki, a kato posledovatelen tekst, no vie si gi predstavjajte njakak. Naj-napred, dokato demokracijata u nas beshe "mlada", az si misleh da pripechelja njakoj lev s tjah (a ne samo da /_izvisjavam_/ duha si pishejki gi), no skoro se ubedih, che osnovnata chast ot horata, t.e. ot vas, pichove, se interesuvat ne tolkova ot cinichni neshta, koeto e filosofsko techenie, da vi napomnja tova, a ot grubi porno-svinshtini i erotika (ponezhe ot tjah se pecheli i te se reklamirat), taka che sega, na stari godini, reshih chisto i prosto da gi publikuvam tuk-tam (ne che ne mozhe njakyde da iskam i zaplashtane, no nadali shte go polucha), ta da ostane neshto netlenno ot men, sled kato az se prevyrna v tlen, ne e li taka? Zashtoto koj znae dali i na onja svjat njama da ima njakakvi zhenski dushi, i vse po-drugo si e da mozhe chovek, pardon, dushata mu, s neshto da blesne pred drugite, urungel ili ne (zashtoto to tova poslednoto za edna dusha ne e ot znachenie).
-->Ami, maj che stiga tolkova kato vstyplenie, zashtoto da vi izpravja napravo pred edin sreden ili baja edyr tashak ne e hubavo bez nikakva podgotovka syvsem, a taka znaete kakvo mozhe da ochakvate. Podpisvam se kato vashija
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-->U.J. Tashkov, mart 2019, Sofija, Bylgarija
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==>*_SYDYRZHANIE NA SERIJATA_*
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-->01. E##nistika (lirika) -- ****
-->02. Uj-la-ri-pi (pesnjovki) -- ***
-->03. Putifurki (kalamburi) -- ***
-->04. Slushajte pichagi (I chast) -- *****
-->05. Slushajte pichagi (II chast) -- *****
-->06. Slushajte pichagi (III chast) -- *****
-->07. Pri frizjora (lirichna poema) -- **
-->08. Seksoneti (soneti) -- ***
-->09. E##netika (lirika) -- ****
-->10. E##nomika (lirika) -- ***
-->   Ochakvat se oshte
-->11. Tashakistika (poetichna lirika) -- ***
-->12. H#istika (lirichni otkrovenija) -- ****
-->13. Mudistika (lirika na russkom) -- ****
-->*_~ ~ ~ ~ ~_*
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-->  Tazi Malka Pichovska Biblioteka
-->  e prijatna, zanimatelna, i leka;
-->  strogo zabranena e za puritani,
-->  maloletni i devojki ne-
-->    /_[predrazpolozheni kym vodni bani]._/
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-->  /_U.J. Tashkov_/
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=>*_TaSHaK PRES, 1998 - 2019 g._*
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-->*_E N D_*
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