In spite of the resistance on the part of my wife and my sons I made up my mind to go to Russia with Ramazanov anyway. He brought the long-distance truck driver by the name of Peter from Shamalsoy.
The driver was a man of medium size, red haired, with blue eyes, an oval face and a little nose and a mustache looking like a horseshoe. He had a scorpion tattooed on his left arm.
Peter arrived on his "Kamaz " truck and stopped at the place where we were piling cases with fruits and vegetables. We were loading the cases the whole day until midnight. Some local boozers whom we had hired helped us with the loading.
On the same night having said our goodbyes to our near and dear we headed along the empty road in darkness. We rode night and day making stops to toilet, take the air and admire the picturesque landscape of the vicinity. Sometimes we would stop at a shop to buy food and soft drinks. Ramazanov would not forget to but vodka as well.
In that way we had spent many days and nights sitting in the huge truck"s cab.
When riding across Kazakhstan the steppes seemed endless to us. We saw packs of wolves and saiga antelopes. Such exotic scenes attract man like the quick sands entrapping the victim with a pitiful female cry. He who comes closer to the sands the ground will suddenly go from under his feet, and he will drown in the crater without being able to get out. The sand craters are dangerous because every step the victim makes will work against him, that is the victim"s motions hasten his death. He drowns in the sand. To stop moving on the road is just as dangerous because you may suddenly be attacked by pirates hiding in the sand. Therefore we drove at a high speed trying not to stop.
Pointing to the picture of a girl there in the cab Ramazanov asked Pete:
-Who is this girl? Your beloved one, is she?
- Yes, you are right -Pete answered smiling.
- I, too, was a tough guy when I was young - said Ramazanov. One day I went to the city circus to relax at the expense of the Trade Union Organization of Uvada Factory. I got acquainted with a girl by the name of Zukhra. She worked as a cleaner in the park. She was about forty five years of age, or younger, a cheerful woman with a freckled face and a big alligator"s mouth, you see. She bump fell in love with me at first sight. And I gave her my address without thinking about the consequences. I was a watchman at the Factory then, do you remember, Al Kizim?
- Yes - I said nodding.
- I was once sitting in the watch-box during the night shift - Ramazanov went on - when someone knocked at the door. I opened it, and she came in. I was at a loss. Suddenly she burst out crying and started kissing me all over.
- Come on Zukhra, don"t do that - I begged her.
. -Yes, my handsome one, I will- she said, kissing me passionately. Shivering with desire, she bolted the door, switched off the light and drew the curtain. Then we long weltered in pleasure with the bed creaking under us. She nearly tore me into pieces. Then we lay talking in darkness.
- Zukhra - I said - you are much older than I, and, besides, you have a family, your husband and your children. I am only 18. Collect yourself, open your eyes before you have ruined your family.
- Darling, - she said:- how can I open my eyes! I am blind from the radiant sun of love! I don"t love my husband! I only love you! If you turn down my love, I will get a flask of gasoline, pour it out on my clothes and strike a match burning myself alive. I"ll leave a note saying that I love you madly.
I kept silent staring at her. I didn"t know what I was supposed to do...
Then she started telling me about her past: "I was a pretty girl in my youth. My friends and I worked in cotton fields. It so happened that once a young man, a tractor driver by the name of Madamin, fell in love with me. I didn"t love him. I rejected his declaration of love and tore the letter which he had written. He begged me to have pity on him. On Women"s Day he presented me with a bunch of beautiful flowers and an expensive fabric which was in fashion then.
Naturally, I didn"t accept his gifts. Then Madamin put the gifts down on the ground, took a box of matches out of his pocket and set fire to the gifts.
- I swear by the name of God to love you all my life and not to get married until I breathe my last. Farewell, Zukhar-khon.
Saying this he went away across the field. I follow him with my eyes until he disappeared beyond the horizon. I felt sorry for the guy. I cried. I thought he might come back. No, he never returned. With time the feeling of compassion I felt turned into love. I began to miss him. I tormented myself about it. I wanted to see Madamin badly. But he couldn"t be found. I asked many people hoping to find him. One man said he had left for Aravan leaving everything behind. Aravan is in the neighboring republic. I would have gone to him but unfortunately I didn"t know his address. Then some match makers came to our house, and my parents married me off. I had resisted of course. Before the wedding they introduced me to my bridegroom. I saw that he was a normal young man, so I gave my consent. My father blessed me before the esteemed people of our village. I was taken to the Registry Office where I nearly fainted. I saw that the gentleman whom I had met looked very different. He had a nylon shirt and a worn skull-cap on and was wearing box calf boots with high bootlegs.
I didn"t know how I should act. There was no way back. My father was an angry man. Fearing my father"s indignation I did not dare stop the wedding. I had nothing else to do but follow my fate.
We got along and had four children. I worked day and night to feed the family. My husband did not work. He had chronic hepatitis. I remember my husband and I once lay in bed sleeping. I woke up to my husband"s sobbing.
He was crying in darkness. I got frightened and asked him :
- What"s the matter with you? Why are you crying? Is your kidney aching again? I will bring the pills now. My husband said:
- No you needn"t. It"s not my kidney that is out of order, it"s my soul. I saw my first wife Mavzhudakhon in my dream.
When I heard that I got petrified. It turned out that he had been married before and had two children. He never told me about it. To make things still worse, he loved her and couldn"t forget her. What a scoundrel, I thought. I couldn"t fall asleep till morning.
Years went by. Ironically, I couldn"t forget Madamin who loved me heart and soul.
Last year a group of young people came to have a rest to the park where I was working. As we talked I learnt that they had arrived from Aravan. When I heard that I had a lump in my throat. When I came round I asked them if they knew the tractor driver Madamin. I even gave them the verbal description of him so that they might recall who he was.
- Yes - they said - we know him very well.
- Oh really? - I said overjoyed - and how is he?
The Aravaners exchanged glances and then said:
He died recently from heart attack. He was a rich man. But somehow he had never got married. He died in solitude, poor man.
- Oh yes? - I said dropping the broom...
Zukhra burst into tears finishing her story. I consoled her stroking her hair.
She left in the morning.
Day went by. I began to feel what is known to be a yearning. Zukhra and I started dating every time I had a night shift. One such night Zukhra came to me with a big package and her children. I was surprised.
- Now your dreams have come true - she said - I have come to you for ever. We will be together from now on, my dear. Nobody will be able to separate us.
On hearing that, I stepped back in fear. Then I said:
- Zukhra, please, understand me, if my father hears this, he will bury me alive, you see? We can live together as before but never get married, never!.. My relatives will kill me.
On hearing this Zukhra sat down on the stool crying:
- Where shall I go now? I have divorced my husband, silly me. What will happen to me? Oh, my Lord...
-An hour later she left. Days and months went by. I did not see her for nearly six months.
At last I got married. During the honey moon my wife suggested that we should go to town to take a walk and have our photo taken. I agreed. We walked about the town and had our picture taken. After lunch my wife wished to take a ride on the carousel. We went to the park, and there your are! - I saw Zukhra. With mittens on she was sweeping the fallen leaves. When she saw us she stood stock-still, a broom in hand, like an old witch from a Russian fairy tale. I greeted her and introduced her to my wife.
- Congratulations - she said.
My wife and I walked away. When we got up high on the carousel I looked down and saw Zukhra stand there watching us. When we got down she was not there. The next time when I was in town I somehow wanted to drop in at the park to see her. But the park employees said she had gone. It so happened that she had left out of town. I took her address and went to the "Ming Chinar" State Farm where she had settled. There I heard the terrible news that she had burnt herself and died in the ambulance car on the way to hospital.
When Ramazanov finished his sad story we fell silent contemplating.
- Well, well, it"s a sad story. She really loved you and could not live without you, poor thing - Pete said shaking his head.
Meanwhile the truck was tearing down the smooth road, rocking us to sleep like a cradle.
Kamaz - Kamskiy avtomobilny zavod - Kama Automobile Zavod - Kamaz or KAMA Heavy-Duty Truck Production Plant) is a Russian truck manufacturer located in Naberezhnye Chelny, Tatarstan, Russian Federation